Dave: "They're going to work out just fine"
Me: "Really? How can you tell?"
Dave: "Well, I just told them. Live together, or die alone."
(Although if you reflect on it, the statement doesn't totally make sense, it was enough to make me spit out my coffee.)
Live together! We choose "live together"!
In other news, I had a panic attack today (tears and all) about my failure in trying to teach Maya shapes and colors. Or much of anything lately. I've been so focused on the PT work, and the feeding/speech work, that I feel like I haven't been doing many cognitive types of exercises or direct teaching. Since her receptive learning-ness (that's a technical term) seems to be her biggest strength, I had a total meltdown over how we'll never get into preschool (and therefore elementary school, middle school, college, or be successful at life) because I haven't been mentally stimulating her enough. Luckily one of the therapists could tell by my manic-sounding text message that I was out on a ledge, and she called to talk me down.
(This may or may not have been triggered by the fact that I'm going on a preschool tour this Friday. Yeah, that's probably what did it.)
First, SO awesome on the Live Together, Die Alone--esp. b/c bunnies themselves are a Lost reference.
ReplyDeleteSecond, D, you are giving Maya EVeRYTHING she needs and more. Never ever doubt that. There will be ebbs and flows...times you focus more on the physical and times you focus more on the mental/intellectual. Look at all the walking/steering progress Maya has made!! That's because of all your hard work. Please go easy on my friend Dana.
i love dave's comment on the bunnies!!! so sorry you had a panic attack----but for you to think you're not doing enough in any aspect for maya is totally unacceptable!!!! you do more for her than you even know and every time you interact with her i see that you are teaching her something. don't be so hard on yourself----you are amazing :-)
ReplyDeleteyou're doing everything you need to be doing and more. parents of 'average' kids have the luxury of focusing on shapes, colors and numbers and even without the added stress of everything else you heard how well that goes
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you're putting your focus where it needs to be. everything else will come in time. but, i think i've got some fun puzzles all packed up and ready to pass along... including one with farm animals (cows!!!!) and some little people stuff!
Oh, you're singing to the choir on that one -- I went to a lecture about how parents of kids with developmental delays are so worried about speech and sensory issues that we forget to teach our kids to write -- even if they can type, learning to hold pencil and make meaningful marks on paper is an important developmental milestone. I panicked. That's me in a nutshell -- so busy working on speech and taking care of sensory things, I forgot to teach them normal things like color, write, draw..... AARRRGGHHH!
ReplyDeleteMy therapist often reminds me that kids only learn one thing at a time. If they are excelling in gross motor skills they won't be excelling in fine motor skills, thus teaching one thing at a time makes sense.
ReplyDeleteHey Dana,
ReplyDeleteShapes and colors are way overrated. And boring (for the kid as well as the parents). Walking is way cooler and much more fun. Very rarely do we need to put a square red peg in a square red hole during our daily routines, but walking, well that is useful. You're doing a great job Dana.
I always used to worry about this with Tabitha. Was I doing enough? Would I stunt her development more by failing to complete each and every task set by the numerous professionals who used to drop by for a hour every other week, or once a month? In the end, I came to realise that she would develop at her own pace, and that I could only do what I could do. If I couldn't do the therapies one day, well, we all need a break. The thing that makes you feel bad about it, is yourself, and I found that by accepting that some things wouldn't get done, I freed myself to enjoy the things I DID do with Tabitha. She is still extremely delayed, but is now in school, and despite excellent one-to-one support, she is still developing painfully slowly. I am finding it a relief to share the teaching, it means we can have more play time at home.
ReplyDeleteBonnie--that's exactly what I'm talking about! Why isn't there a list or something---fun and meaningful activities/skills to work on for SAHMs of children with developmental delays. Sometimes things just don't cross my mind.
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